Dear Younger Self,

Some days when I think back to who I am now and who I used to be, a wave washes over me.

I can’t help but want to hug the girl I once was and tell her over and over again it is going to be just fine.

I  want to whisper in my ear all of the thoughts holding me down would one day disappear.

And I want to always recall how I felt on that first night of my honeymoon as the humid air surrounded me.

I  want to always remember the feeling of being free.

I  was free from the thought that I didn’t deserve more. 

I stopped moving and I stopped busying myself.

I stopped humming within my own brain, a soft tune, and I stopped babbling on and on.

And as I stood there, I  could feel my heart beat and my throat tighten as tears welled in my eyes. 

Because for a few years, I stopped living.

But in this moment, as the air cascaded my cheeks, life began again. 

I  knew there was more to life than believing in the naysayers. 

I knew life was filled up with opportunities and dreams which were echoing within the internal depths of my being. 

I knew I had to change and fulfill my own hopes and dreams to one day be a role model for my own children.

I knew all along my voice mattered and my words mattered. 

 I knew all along I was placed here to inspire and encourage, to teach and to model. 

I knew all along, I had to be more. I  knew I  was more. 

I knew, miles away from home, this day was a new chance on life.

So as I meandered along, gazing out at the sun meeting the horizon, I  too met myself.

I knew I would not waver.

And more importantly, I knew, a blustery gust of wind would carry me home to the new woman I was becoming.

That girl though, she is not forgotten.

She is embedded deep within every crevice of who I am and who I will always be.

That girl will never be left behind.